Leaders Aren’t Burned Out Because They’re Weak—They’re Burned Out From Pretending
Burnout doesn’t always look like someone curled up in bed with nothing left to give. Sometimes it’s the high performer who’s crushing deadlines but dying inside. The leader who always shows up smiling—but feels like a shell of themselves. The team that keeps grinding—but has no fire left. Have you been there too?
And here’s the kicker:
They’re not burned out because they’re weak.
They’re burned out from pretending to be someone they’re not.
When leaders feel like they have to perform rather than lead, suppress instead of express, or conform instead of align—burnout is inevitable. This isn’t a flaw in their character. It’s a failure of culture, authenticity, and values in action.
Do you know how to see the signs of burnout in your leaders—before it breaks you or your team?
Spot the Signs of Burnout in Yourself and Your Leaders
Burnout creeps in quietly. It builds in the background until the pressure breaks the dam. The earlier you spot it, the easier it is to course-correct.
Signs of Burnout in Yourself
You’re exhausted, even after a full night’s sleep. Physical rest doesn’t fix emotional depletion.
Your inner critic is louder than ever. Everything feels like a failure. Nothing feels good enough.
You’ve stopped dreaming. Ambition used to drive you—now it just feels like pressure.
You dread what used to excite you. The meetings, the projects, the people—it all feels heavy.
You feel like a fraud. You’re performing a role that no longer fits, but feel stuck playing it anyway.
Signs of Burnout in Your Team
Low energy, high turnover. Engagement is flat, and even top performers are looking for the exit.
Over-yes-ing and under-delivering. People are saying yes out of fear, not motivation.
Lack of creativity or initiative. Your team is in survival mode. Innovation? Not happening.
Cynicism and sarcasm. Watch the tone—burned-out teams often use humor to mask disconnection.
Disappearing boundaries. People working late, replying at all hours, never unplugging.
The Root Isn’t Just Overwork—It’s Misalignment
You can’t wish your way out of burnout if your leadership identity is out of sync with your truth. The real work starts by getting brutally honest about where you’ve been operating out of alignment—with your values, your energy, and your leadership.
We’ve been taught to believe that strong leadership means being unshakable. But the truth? Strength looks like self-awareness. And courage looks like course-correcting before the crash.
Leadership Coaching Tools to Recover and Rebuild
Here’s how to take back your leadership from the edge of burnout—and bring your team with you.
1. Get real about your role.
Who are you trying to be? And who do you actually want to be? Leadership starts with dropping the mask and showing up with integrity.
Leadership Coaching Prompt
What parts of your leadership feel performative? What would it look like to lead as yourself?
2. Normalize rest and boundaries.
Stop celebrating exhaustion like it’s a badge of honour. Build recovery into your system—not as a perk, but as a leadership imperative.
Leadership Coaching Practice
Block “no-meeting” times into your calendar. Model what it means to unplug.
3. Have the real conversations
Burnout festers in silence. If your team doesn’t feel safe to speak, they’ll suffer in quiet rebellion.
But let’s be clear—this isn’t just about your team. If you as the leader are burned out, you need to say it out loud. Hiding it doesn’t help anyone—it just models self-abandonment.
You are not in this alone. And you’re not above needing support. You are responsible for your energy. That means being honest when you need help.
Your people are watching. They’re counting on your clarity, your presence, your steadiness.
They need you healthy—not perfect. Not invincible. Just real, grounded, and human.
Leadership Coaching Practice
In your next 1:1s ask “What’s one thing about your workload or our culture that’s draining you right now?”
4. Lead from your values—not just your KPIs
Burnout often shows up when people don’t understand why their work matters. Anchor your leadership in purpose, not performance metrics.
5. Redefine what success looks like (for real)
Growth doesn’t mean saying yes to everything. It means learning to say yes to the right things. It also means learning to say no to the right things too. Let go of what’s not yours to carry.
Leadership Coaching Prompt
Write down 5 things you’re chasing right now. Now ask yourself: Is this for approval, achievement, or alignment?
You Can’t Lead Powerfully While Pretending
Burnout isn’t fixed by working harder.
It’s healed by coming home to yourself.
You don’t need to do more.
You need to do what matters.
You need to lead from a place that’s honest, grounded, and human.
That’s not weakness.
That’s the kind of leadership the world needs more of.
Toronto, Ontario + Prince Edward County, Ontario, Canada
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